Oh but you are doing so well, they say, you are a survivor they say, it can't have been that traumatic they say.

But is was.

It was nearly the end of me.

it was the end of a part of myself

I don't think I could ever get that back.

How dare you all downplay the effect that bastard had on my life.

You didn't see, you didn't feel, you weren't there and you don't even care.

It isn't something you want to care about.

I don't care if you love him, he raped me, but he didn't kill me, so it's ok to date him, call him, bring him over.

He did kill me. He killed my chance for a normal relationship with a man

He killed my self esteem

He killed my courage, and my confidence

He turned me into this sniveling fearful little girl

I can't trust anyone

and that is his fault.

He ruined me. He ruined my life, my happiness.

He raped me, and he wrecked me.

He ever ADMITS to it

and still, he is more valuable than I am

Because I still walk and talk, I work and go to school

I can't have been that traumatized.

Honey you have no idea how fucked up I am because of him.

I don't care if divorce is wrong, Mom, he was hurting your daughter.

Didn't you love me, at all?

And you love him? The person that brutalized your best friend. DOn't you love yourself? Enough to realize he could do the same to you.